Breaking Through the Walls
by Ayushi95
Summary: Alex is caught in the middle of the war between Amanda and Nikita. She is the key to the winning. After Geneva Alex is stuck with Amanda, is she going to break through her walls, is nikita going to lose her grip on her? Which side is she going to choose?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! :D I'm back with a new story. You can thank Nikalex and Itsmepeterpan to blackmail me for starting a new story. **

**This idea is from Average Ordinary Person and Chpll5125 and I had started this is in 'Change it' but then figured out that I can make a nw story out of it. So here's the story version of it. A few changes are made in the chapter. :)**

**This is my version of what happens in Ossetia and after Ossetia. **

**Anyways... In this, I haven't got in Larissa for some convinience.**

**I hope you guys love and enjoy this and Review it! :D**

"Looks like I'm not leaving Geneva, empty handed after all." Amanda said as she roared the engine and sped off.

"Amanda, just let me go!" Alex said as she sat on the back seat panicking.

"You're in position?" Amanda said as pressed her finger in her ear. Amanda nodded at the affirmative response and looked the rear view mirror to find Alex trying hard to stay calm. She smiled at seeing Alex so vulnerable.

"Don't worry, Alex. We have a lot of time to have some proper conversation." Amanda said and pulled over near a black SUV. Three guards came up near the car and opened the door for Alex.

"Go on, and please. Be nice to them." Amanda said and smiled.

"As if you care." Alex said and stepped out. "Hands up!" A man said and aimed for Alex's chest. "You're not going to use that. So why don't you just shut up." Alex said looking into his eyes.

"UUGGHH! Alex screamed in pain as a bullet passed through her right arm and she stumbled forward. She turned around, holding her hand in pain to find Amanda as the shooter. "You should've obeyed him. There's a price to everything." Amanda said and gave a nod the guards. He grabbed Alex's arm piercing her fingers in her soft skin near the wound and sending another continuous wave of pain in her body. "Aaghh! Just, leave me!" Alex said trying to get his rock grip off around her arm. "Just shut up!" The man said and whipped her face knocking her out.

"Good. Wrap something around her arm to avoid blood loss and then we can leave." Amanda ordered and the man did as he was told to do.

"We can't have her dying, not now." Amanda said as she sat in the back seat of the SUV and the man settled Alex on the other end of the seat, tying her hands to the handle.

They sped off into the darkness.

The men pulled Alex's unconscious body out of the car and dragged her into the building. The building itself was creepy. With doors and walls covered with blood. They squeaked open another door and dragged Alex, into the room shutting the door behind with a bang.

"Hello Alex, how are you feeling? I can't have you dying on me now..." Were the first words she could hear as she slowly opened her eyes. Her vision was blurry, but she could make out that Amanda was sitting in front of her. She tensed up her body and straightened herself in the chair she was tied into. She tried to pull the handcuffs hoping for any kind of luck, but failed. She only succeeded in causing her arm more pain. She looked at it and found a white bandage wrapped around the wound. The temperatures were freezing and Amanda had made things difficult by leaving her only with a black tank top. No sweaters, no jackets, nothing to keep her warm. Goosebumps covered her whole body as she shivered.

"You're the key to getting everything that I want." Amanda added, getting up from her chair and walking towards Alex.

Amanda sighed and said, "It's been a long time since we've had a proper conversation."

"I would've ordered some tea but... I don't think they can even boil water." She added whispering as she tilted his towards the guards back at the door.

"Still keeping high class company, I see." Alex said.

"The Ossetians are just a partner of convenience. The soldiers always need weapons and in return they've allowed me a safe haven in their country." Amanda said casually.

"So, what's the plan? Torture...? Videotaped and sent to Nikita?" Alex asked as if it didn't matter what was going to come next.

"Perhaps later, but for now let's just keep it casual hmm? Tell me, how are things at division?" Amanda asked walking further towards Alex.

"Fine. Everyone's very excited about hunting you down." Alex said looking into Amanda's eyes.

"Hmmm... See, I-it must be stressful, knowing that the government could come in and wipe you out at any moment?" Amanda enquired.

"Ginkgo biloba helps, so does ginseng." Alex retorted.

"And Michael and Nikita? How are they doing with his disability?" Amanda asked walking behind Alex.

"Been rough, but I think they'll get through it. I mean other; couples have survived without haircuts before haven't they?" Alex retorted clicking Amanda's temper off.

Amanda lifted a belt from the table and strangled Alex as she gritted her teeth and said, "As long as Nikita has Ari, you still have some value. But I never promised to return you in one piece." She let the belt go and let Alex fill up some oxygen back in her body. Amanda walked in front of Alex as she coughed trying to catch her breath.

"Now about Ari, tell me how did Division capture him." Amanda said as narrowed her eyes.

"Capture." Alex said mocking at the word and gulped down the lump in her throat. "He came in on his own." She said. "That's how desperate he was to get away from you." She added.

Amanda narrowed her eyes and said, "Don't gloat Alex." Amanda said and paused. "It wasn't your victory. I was Nikita's as they all are. You're just a background player." She continued.

"Now, about the questions." Amanda said walking towards Alex.

"How does it matter? Nothing I say is going to help you." Alex said looking away from Amanda and trying to stay calm.

"Why does it matter? Nothing I say, will ever help you." Alex said still looking at the windows in front of her.

"Interesting isn't it? How fiercely you protect Division, the place you've hated for so long. Now, how did, that happen? Alright, it was Nikita's idea. Did she even bother to ask you first?" Amanda said trying to hurt Alex's ego.

"No, because she doesn't know what I know. That there's another Alex, the one who doesn't take orders, the one who gives them. I've seen her, the heir to the Zetrov throne." Amanda continued hurting Alex.

"That was just a dream. The one you created by pumping me full of drugs." Alex said looking back at her.

"No. It was your potential. One that you could still fulfil." Amanda said.

"Why do you care Amanda?" Alex asked.

"Because one day, what you want and what Nikita wants will come into conflict and I can't wait to see the look on Nikita's face when it does." Amanda answered.

"And that's not going to happen!" Alex said looking back into Amanda's eyes.

"Nikita didn't have a need to ask me. Because she and I both knew that I'm going to be by her side no matter what her decision is. And she never forced the decision upon me, she always gave me a free way to go and live my life with Sean." Alex added fiercely.

"And what about Nikita and you?" Amanda asked.

"Nikita was so lost in Michael that she didn't even notice that you relapsed." Amanda added.

"It was never meant to come in her notice, anyways." Alex said looking away from Amanda.

"Yeah, but if Nikita would've cared about you like the time she did without Michael in the picture, then wouldn't she have noticed it?" Amanda said. She could see she was hurting Alex's ego and the anger building up inside of her.

Alex stayed silent. She could remember feeling a little left out since the time Michael and Nikita got together. She knew Nikita cared about her and would give her life up if needed to, but she also knew that now she had Michael to go to when she was upset. She could feel a change over come Nikita as she got closer to Michael. She could feel Michael replacing the position of '1st priority' of Nikita from herself. Even when she relapsed, a part of her wanted Nikita to notice it. For once she wanted Nikita to notice her and not Michael. But she didn't let her doubts and feelings come in the way because she knew Nikita will always be by her side no matter what and whenever she needed.

Amanda cleared her throat bringing Alex out of her thoughts. "Where did you go away?" Amanda asked knowing that her words were working on Alex.

"Was just imagining the look on your face when you'll see Nikita and me still standing side by side even after these stupid little mind games of yours." Alex said. For a minute Amanda's techniques had worked on her but she knew the facts and she knew Amanda too well.

Amanda slapped Alex's face and pulled her head up. She looked straight into her eyes and said, "I still have a lot of time to spend with you. I'll make sure you suffer in the worst possible ways within this time." She let her head go with a rough push.

"And what? All you know is to hurt people. You couldn't get love, so you're going to take away love from Nikita's life. But what you don't know is, that no matter what you do Nikita is always going to have Michael, Owen, Birkhoff, Sonya, Ryan, Sean and me in spirit or body. You can never really tear us apart because we all know that we love each other and will risk our lives for each other, each and every day. We know that none of us will turn their backs on them willingly. And this is possible because of a feeling named 'Love' which doesn't exist in your life and will never exist. You tried to kill your boyfriend who was just trying to keep you in control and protect you from Nikita. You don't deserve love Amanda. You're just a bitch who can hurt people for own known personal reasons." Alex said.

Amanda's anger rose and she started strangling Alex again. She started gasping for air, but she knew that Amanda will eventually control herself and let it go. "You will turn your back to Nikita one day and you'll be on my side." Amanda said and let the belt go.

Alex coughed as she tried to catch hold of her breath again. "You're just a whiny, angry little bitch. There is nothing that I need to be scared of. All you can do is torture me and try to fill some poison in my brain against Nikita. You can't do anything else. You're just as powerless as I am right now." Alex said as she grinned. Alex could see how she easily she could control Amanda's anger.

Amanda punched Alex on her face so hard that it hurt her knuckles and Alex's chair fell to the ground. She caught her hand and rubbed her thumb on her knuckles. Alex just smiled and spit out some blood. Amanda nodded at her guards and one of them got Alex back up.

"Take her away to the main room." Amanda ordered and they opened Alex up and dragged her in the main room. "Hmmm... So, where am I going to be placed?" Alex asked as she looked around the room. It was a room filled with torture equipments and chair, table, bed, chains hanging low from the ceiling. The blood that was spread over in the entire room, made her believe that she isn't the first one to get tortured here. The guards didn't respond just continued holding her tight and threw her face down on the bed. And tied her hands and legs to the four corners of the bed.

Amanda shortened the distance between them. She pushed Alex's top up, exposing her more to the cold. "You've grown cold." Amanda said as she trailed her hands on Alex's spine and unclasped her bra and walked away to the table which was placed near the end of the bed, out of Alex's sight. She picked up her preferred instrument of torture and fixed it on fingers.

Alex shot her head up as she felt a tearing pain shoot through her back. Amanda had fixed claws on her three fingers and pierced them in Alex's flesh, a few inches under her left shoulder and dragged it way down till her jeans. Alex had hardly managed not to scream. She gritted her teeth and groaned but somehow controlled her scream. She could feel blood coming out of the cuts and the flesh around it swell. It pained and burned her but in a way the warm blood on her skin gave a relief to her from the cold. But she would prefer to stay in the cold than get warmth from her blood loss. Alex's breathing grew heavy and uneven by the time Amanda finished her first round of cuts.

"Hmmm... Let's see if you can hold on to that scream in the next one too." Amanda said and even before Alex could reply, she pierced the claws, a few inches below her right shoulder and starting from the same level as the previous ones and ending it near her jeans.

Alex smiled as she again successfully controlled her scream. Her lower lip had started to bleed to as she bit it hard trying to keep the scream inside. "Looks like I'm good at holding in my scream." Alex commented and her head shot up and tears flowed out of the corner of her eyes as Amanda pierced the claws again in her flesh at the start of the left side cuts and dragged it down towards the end of the right side cuts as slowly as she could giving Alex more and more pain. "Scream!" Amanda yelled and put more pressure on the claws finally making Alex scream and giving music to Amanda's ears. Amanda smiled satisfied and dragged her fingers further down to Alex's jeans in the painful manner as she also slowly kept on increasing the pressure.

Alex breathed heavily when Amanda was down sculpting her masterpiece on Alex's back. She could feel the pain, burn and swell and could also make out what Amanda had actually done on her back which was more than just making three scars. Amanda had scratched a huge 'N' on her back.

"Now you'll always have the cause on your pain on your pain. Those scars are deep enough to remain on your back till you die. And seriously, if you continue being on Nikita's side then I'm quite sure I'll get you kill you soon." Amanda said, bending down to meet Alex's eyes. Alex could feel the blood all over her back and belly. The bed beneath her was soaking in her blood too.

"No matter what you do or say Amanda, you'll never be able to break me and the bond that I share with Nikita, Sean, Michael, Birkhoff, Ryan, Owen and Sonya. You can go ahead and do an 'S' for Sean and an 'M' for Michael and go on. But I will never join you Amanda." Alex said and paused. "And hoestly, I'm just not good at being a bitch like you." Alex continued and earned a smack on her face before resting her head head back on the bed. Amanda smiled and said, "I might not be able to do it right now, but it'll happen later on."

"Nikita is the reason why you've suffered so much and she's the reason why you're suffering right now." Amanda said and lifted Alex's head up. "You had faith in her that she'll save you and see where it has got you!" She added.

"You're just a little bitch who is trapped in between Nikita and me, because of Nikita. She is going to be the reason why all of you are going to pay and especially you, Michael and Birkhoff. You guys are going to pay for turning your backs at me and joining arms with Nikita. You are going to pay for being Nikita's mole and breaking my trust on you each and every single day." Amanda said and let her head go.

"Nikita is not the cause to any pain. Circumstances, situations, betrayal make it happen." Alex said.

"Circumstances like Nikita breaking your arm and shooting you in the leg. Situations like Nikita being so much into Michael and his disability that she didn't notice your relapse. Betrayals like Nikita not confessing it to you earlier that she is your father's killer." Amanda added to Alex's answer.

"Nikita shot me to keep me out of the field and to keep me safe! Nikita kept it away to keep me on the mission. It was necessary." Alex replied back.

"Hmmm.. Interesting way to keep someone safe, isn't it? And what do you have to say about your relapse?" Amanda asked.

"All Nikita cares now is about Michael and her relationship with him. You've just ended up as an extra person in her life who she is responsible for. She is just using you as a help to take me down. Tell me, when Nikita let you make a decision. She made decisions not only for her own self but for everyone else too. Birkhoff, Michael, Sean, YOU! All of you could be out of danger if you would've just left but no, she didn't let that happen. She used yours and theirs love and care for her to keep you guys with her. Sean has got into this mess just because of you and one day he might suffer too, just because you chose to stay by Nikita's side. Nikita has given you nothing against your love, except for pain." Amanda answered when Alex couldn't. But it was definitely what Alex would've answered but it was the truth too. Everything that Amanda said was the truth and it did make her doubts come up again.

"If Nikita giving me pain is a reason for you to make me turn my back against her, then why should I even join you? You haven't done anything else than giving me more pain too. You've pumped me up with drugs, you've used my withdrawal as an advantage and tried to get information out of me. You've tried to kill me a dozen times, you're hurting me right now." Alex said.

"Because I never hurt you against your love, you never loved me. Because I never betrayed you or wore masks. I was as clean as I could be. My intentions were clear even while questioning you or drugging you. I never had any hidden agendas. On the other hand, you were the one who betrayed me." Amanda said.

"But I was never an asset for Nikita. When Division was in Percy's hands I was a disposable agent and in your hands, I was someone valuable due to my Udinov tag. You just used me, while Nikita gave me options and chances to leave everything and have a normal life. I chose to stick with her, no matter what the consequences are. I entered Division in the first place just to take my revenge for my father's death. She didn't even plan to tell me anything about it. She never wanted me in any of this mess." Alex said.

Her energy was getting low. She could feel the effect of blood loss take over her as she had lost the energy now to keep her head up and talk with Amanda. She rested her head back on the bed as her head started to get lighter. Amanda noticed Alex's weakness and motioned one of her man to step forward.

"I'm going to let her rest for some time, keep her breathing." Amanda ordered and left with her guards.

"Who are you?" Alex asked in a weak voice. The man ignored Alex's question and injected her with morphine and sedative to make her fall unconscious.

_10 HOURS LATER._

"Alex? Hello. Alex." Alex heard her name being called out. She slowly got out of her unconsciousness and startled as her brain recognized the voice. _Nikita! _Alex thought recognizing the voice.

**Hey guys! :D I hope you loved it and review it! :D **

**Chpl5125 and Average Ordinary Person, I hope you guys are happy to read it as a new story at last! :D **

**The next update will be on Sunday (Hopefully! :P) **

**Thanks! :D I hope you guys come back to find out what happens to Alex and the team ahead. :D **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys! :D So here's a new update! :D I hope you guys like it! I'm glad to see that you guys liked the first chapter! :D **

**Nikalex! :D Thanks a ton again to be with me again with this story too! :D :* **

_**10 HOURS LATER**_

"Alex? Hello. Alex." Alex heard her name being called out. She slowly got out of her unconsciousness and startled as her brain recognized the voice. Nikita! Alex thought recognizing the voice.

"Nikita." Alex called out and felt a comforting hand on her face. She looked around. She was in... division medical?

"What... what the hell am I doing here?" Alex asked frantically as she pushed Nikita's hand away from her face.

"It's me, Alex. It's okay. You were found in the barn today morning, unconscious." Nikita smiled as she reached out for Alex again.

"In the barn? How? I... I... was taken by Amanda. What the hell happened? How did she just drop me off at Division? What the hell is going on?" Alex yelled.

"No, Alex. I think you just need to relax Alex. It's all ok." Nikita whispered as she rubbed Alex's hand.

"What do you mean by its all okay? You don't get to tell me that! The last time I was awake, I was getting tortured by Amanda." Alex said and got out of the bed.

"Amanda? What did Amanda do Alex? You were nowhere near Amanda, Alex. Why are talking about her?" Nikita asked confused.

"What the hell are you talking? We were on a mission to get Stephan to safety and then I had to get myself caught by the cops! And then Amanda took me away!" Alex said getting irritated by Nikita's talks.

"Stephan? Who Stephan? What are you saying Alex? Just... Just calm down. You need to rest." Nikita said getting up and walking towards Alex, trying to get her back to the bed.

"What the hell are you talking about Nikita!? You don't believe me? I can show it to you! Look!" Alex said and turned around before pulling up her top from behind.

"Look what Alex? There's nothing here." Nikita said as she trailed her fingers on Alex's back.

"What!" Alex exclaimed and faced her back to the mirror and twisted her face to her left, trying to look in the mirror behind.

Tears welled up in her eyes as confusion arose. She shook her head negatively and said, "No! No! No! There should be 9 long scars over there!" She couldn't understand how her back was completely untouched.

"What are you talking Alex? Calm down. Lets... Let's talk about it Alex." Nikita said and softly pulled Alex back towards the bed.

Alex ripped her arm out of Nikita's grip as tears flowed out of her eyes. "What is happening Nikita? This... This is definitely one of Amanda's mind games." Alex said and backed away from Nikita.

"Alex. It's not a mind game. You need to tell me what you are talking about." Nikita said and walked towards Alex.

"I was taken by Amanda in Geneva! I was tortured and then I fell unconscious. And now I wake up in Division medical." Alex said trying hard not to run away.

"Well, you're clearly not tortured and we haven't been to Geneva, Alex. You need to calm down." Nikita said and held Alex's hand again.

Alex again got her hand out and yelled, "What the hell is going on Nikita?"

"Alex... Alex... Look at me. I believe you okay? I believe you. But we have to see what's going on. Because you don't have any scars on your back and we weren't there in Geneva." Nikita said calmly.

"But... But I can't believe you! I know the pain that I felt! I heard what Amanda made me hear! I know it damn it!" Alex said and ran out of the room. She ran until she reached her recruit room. She opened the door and slammed it shut.

"What the hell is going on? I... I need to get out of this." Alex said as she panicked. She locked her fingers in her hair as she paced back and forth. She rubbed her palms on her face and wiped her tears off. "I should talk to Nikita about this." Alex said and turned around. She walked up to the door and tried to pull it open but failed. Her panic rose again. "Help! Nikita! Help! Sean! Michael! Nikita! Birkhoff! Ryan!" Alex yelled for help as she banged her hand on the door.

Suddenly a fire struck in the corner of the room and spread across the four walls. In an instant she was wrapped around by fire and smoke. She panicked more than ever as images of Operation Pale Fire flashed through her mind.

Suddenly a masked man came up with a machine gun. It was like the man wasn't aware of Alex's presence in the room.

"Who the hell are you? Where did you come from? Let me out of here!" Alex yelled.

The man lifted his machine gun and pointed it straight ahead of him. Alex followed the line of the gun to take a look at the target and found Sean standing there with his hands tied up to the ceiling. "No!" Alex yelled and came in front of Sean, but the bullet passed through her and hit Sean in his chest.

Alex turned around and looked at Sean. She tried to touch him, but her hands would just pass through him, as if he wasn't real. As if he was a ghost. "Sean!" Alex cried and turned around to look at the shooter through the smoke.

The shooter pulled out his mask. "Nikita." Alex whispered with a confused gaze. Nikita grinned and said, "One more down, first your father and now Sean. Both are dead. Now it's time for the last one." She pulled out a pistol from her back and shot her head.

* * *

"Nikita!" Alex yelled as she got out of her unconsciousness. This had been going on since hours. Amanda would drug her and she would have nightmares for every possible even in her life that hurt her.

Tears had covered Alex's eyes. She knew that it was one of Amanda's sick games but it felt so real. The masked woman will always haunt her dreams.

She blinked her eyes trying to hold her tears back as she heard Nikita's voice calling her again. She wondered if it was just another sick dream again, a dream inside a dream. She had already gone through so many dreams that more than a comfort, Nikita's voice caused her fear.

"Alex? Please Alex, are you ok?" Nikita shouted worried to death, making her focus more.

Alex concentrated her gaze and noticed that this time Amanda had made a video call to Nikita. Amanda stood up and walked behind Alex.

"Alex? Are you ok?" Nikita asked again.

Alex stared at Nikita and tried to keep her fear away. She had to know the difference between a nightmare and the reality. If she couldn't differentiate, then it can all be over. Her relations with her whole family will be destroyed. She just had to hold on to the reality.

She hoped that Nikita hadn't seen the few seconds of fear in her eyes. She just nodded affirmatively afraid that her voice will betray her and will give Amanda the upper hand, make her use again the memory of the masked woman. She knew that she couldn't deal with that much longer. The masked woman haunted her nightmares without having Amanda making it even worse.

"That was sick Amanda. And too low for you." Alex whispered so that only Amanda could hear her comment.

Amanda bent down in order to whisper to Alex's ears. "It hurt. Didn't it?" Amanda asked grinning.

"Amanda! Stop doing that to her!" Nikita said through gritted teeth knowing that Amanda would torture emotionally Alex in the worst possible ways.

"I'm not doing anything Nikita. It's just you who is causing her all the pain; pain in her life, nightmares, over here and everywhere and always." Amanda said carefully choosing every word only to cause pain to Nikita. She loved see the walls that Nikita would try to keep in front of her, break.

"Do you want to hear her voice? We can arrange that!" Amanda added with a devious smile. Without a warning Amanda took a bottle of alcohol and poured it on Alex's bloody and scratched back. Alex instantly gritted her teeth, closed her fists and bit her lips trying hard to control her screams as her body got soaked in alcohol. Her opened wounds screamed out in pain as the alcohol took more and more effect on her back. She groaned and winced a little, that was the closest she could go on without an actual screaming her lungs out.

"What are you doing to her?" Nikita yelled when she saw Alex trying to hold her screams.

"You wanted to hear her voice. I am helping you with that. Come on Alex, scream for Nikita." Amanda replied calmly grinning.

When Alex remained silent, Amanda pushed her thumb in Alex's reopened gunshot on her shoulder. Whimpers and groans left her mouth and tears left her eyes but a heart wrenching scream was still controlled by her.

Alex groaned out in pain but held her scream back. "Amanda, stop it!" Nikita yelled as her own tears started coming up.

"Alex, please scream!" Nikita shouted devastated with her tears now streaming down her eyes seeing Amanda torturing Alex so mercilessly.

Alex neither replied to Nikita nor to Amanda. Amanda grew impatient and nodded at one of her guards.

Alex snapped and groaned and arched her body as suddenly a bucket full of salty water was splashed upon her.

Amanda grinned as the water was splashed on Alex. Giving her no time to recover from her burn she stepped back and twisted the knob on the batteries on, making 1000 volts of current pass through Alex.

It didn't take long to make Alex scream. Salty water and current was never a good combination and making someone who is already tortured to go through it, would only make it worse.

Alex soon screamed her lungs out and passed out when Amanda finally switched the knob off after what felt like forever.

"See you tomorrow, Nikita." Amanda said as she walked closer to the camera and ended the call.

**Hey guys! :D I hope you guys liked this! :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hope you guys like this chapter. :D **

**And Nikalex! I loved suggestions and I hope u liked how I merged both our ideas! :D **

**CHAPTER 3**

"Hello, Division." Amanda's voice echoed inside Division as her face flashed up on the screen.

"What do you want Amanda?" Nikita asked trying to not give in to her anger. Her little sister was in the hands of her sworn enemy. She couldn't even think of what Amanda might be doing to Alex and she didn't want to think about it.

"Relax, Nikita. You've surely forgotten your manners." Amanda smirked.

"Just tell us what you want!" Sean said as he grits his teeth. He was trying hard to control his anger but the thought about Alex being under Amanda was torturing him. He just wished if Alex would've agreed with him and left this place, left Division and had a life with him. If she hadn't denied his offer or if he had tried harder to convince her, then Alex would be besides him and not under Amanda.

"Sean, nice to see you again." Amanda said calmly. She enjoyed watching their walls and masks break.

"Just cut the crap, lady. And tell us want you want!" Birkhoff spoke up. He normally wouldn't have spoke up like this, but his memories from the time when he was captured by Amanda; wouldn't let him stay quiet, it scared him. He feared that Amanda can do a lot worse to Alex than him.

Amanda narrowed her eyes and spoke again. "I'm sure you would like to meet my guest." Amanda said and seconds later a few pictures popped up on their screen showing Alex hanging high in the air and screaming out of pain. Her face was bruised with blood drawing out from her nose, eyebrows and lips.

Nikita felt a wave of guilt rush through her. _Why didn't she just leave me when she had the chance to! I'm sorry Alex; I'm sorry to fail again and again and again to protect you._

The painful look on Alex's face sent shrills down Birkhoff's and Sean's spines. Birkhoff couldn't help but relive the time he spent under Amanda; his own screams echoed in her brain, he could feel that pain run through his body again. He gulped down as he continued staring at the pictures with wide eyes.

Sean fists his hand and gritted his teeth as tears were just seconds away from showing up in his eyes. The time that he spent, trying to convince Alex to leave came in front of him. He wished so hard if Alex would've left with him or at least left Nikita.

It all disappeared within a few seconds and Amanda's evil grinned face reappeared. "That was from... just 4 hours ago I think." Amanda said and grinned.

"Why? Why Amanda? If you wanted Ari, you didn't have to hurt her! If you wanted me, I would have turned myself to you without a second thought! WHY?" Nikita yelled frustrated.

"This isn't about Ari or you." Amanda replied calmly.

"Then?" Michael questioned with hate in his voice.

"Just a little bet that I have with my dear Alex." Amanda replied still smiling.

"She will join our company in a few seconds." Amanda added casually before Nikita could say anything else and walked away from the camera, revealing an empty chair with handcuffs of both of its arms. And just a few seconds later, Alex was thrown in to the chair like she weighed nothing, like she was just ragged doll.

Nikita's breath was caught in between as she saw how the guards just roughly threw Alex's unconscious body in the chair and cuffed her to it.

"Alex, hello. Alex." Nikita said worried.

"Nikita." Alex said and slowly lifted her head up, her eyes were still closed.

"She isn't talking to you Nikita. Amanda has drugged her." Sean whispered in her ear making her jump.

Nikita looked back at Sean and then at Alex. She could notice Alex murmuring something but her eyes were still closed. She could see the distress on Alex's features. Her expressions changed from happy to confusion to surprise to fear to anxiety.

They all watched in silence not daring to say a word. All of them knew by now, what was going on with Alex and it was pretty obvious too. None of them wanted to cause Alex more pain than she already was in, due to her nightmares caused by the drug.

"Amanda..." Alex trailed it off causing a spark of anger rise again in everyone. Nikita clenched her fists controlling herself from trying to say anything that could comfort her Alex. She watched as Alex started murmuring again until she again yelled, "No! No! No!" And went back to murmurings.

Sean's heart ached as he saw Alex in so much pain. He couldn't watch Alex being trapped in her own mind. He wanted to comfort Alex but he also knew that it wasn't going to help her.

"But... But I can't believe you!" Alex yelled and her breathing started to get heavier.

Michael gritted her teeth as he cursed Amanda for doing this to Alex. He wanted to get inside Amanda's head a rip every memory of her out and twist it in worst possible ways and hurt her. He just couldn't watch the young girl who over the time came to be like his daughter suffer because Amanda was interested in playing a sick game.

Alex's breathing grew heavier as she yelled out again. "Help! Nikita! Help! Sean! Michael! Birkhoff! Ryan!" Her hands moved violently against her cuffs as she yelled.

She suddenly stopped moving just kept on breathing heavily as her eyes started to tear up. "Let me out of here!" She yelled again.

"No!" She yelled again. She took in a deep breath and let it out again.

They watched as Amanda whispered something in her ears and she immediately had its effect in her nightmare as she yelled out "Sean!" and tears started flowing out of her eyes.

Sean's heart raced as she painfully yelled his name out. Tears welled up in his eyes and anger rose inside of him as he felt useless. His Alex was calling him out for help and he couldn't even say a word. Alex yelled his name out again with such pain, but he couldn't even tell her that he was right there. His blood boiled as he thought what Amanda would've told her.

The pain was clear on her face; everyone could understand that something terrible had happened to Sean.

"Nikita..." She whispered again in a tone of disbelief and betrayal causing a wave of guilt to rush over Nikita. She was again the cause of pain for Alex and she couldn't even do anything about it.

"Nikita!" Alex yelled again and came out of her nightmare. Nikita came forward and watched as Alex's gaze was filled with fear and pain as she breathed heavily.

"Alex." Nikita called out but Alex wouldn't reply. She just stared at them with her mind running in her own thoughts.

"Alex. Please Alex, are you okay?" Nikita asked worried to death she could see that Alex was now looking at her with concentration as if she was trying to figure out if it was just another dream.

Nikita's fear grew as Alex couldn't reply again. "Alex? Are you okay?" Nikita asked again her fear and worry increasing with every try.

She sighed when she at least received a nod from Alex telling that she's okay. But she knew Alex better than that and she knew that Alex was still fighting to recognize if this was a dream or not. She wondered since how many hours this would be going on? Or what Alex would've seen in her nightmare that caused fear inside of her towards Nikita.

Nikita looked at them confused as they exchanged a few whispers. She could see that Amanda's whisper had caused Alex pain.

"Stop doing that to her!" Nikita said with gritted teeth.

Others just watched in silence. Nikita was falling apart and they knew that if they spoke then it'll just show their pain, which Alex would never like Amanda to witness.

"I'm not doing anything Nikita. It's just you who is causing her all the pain; pain in her life, nightmares, over here and everywhere and always." Amanda's words hit her with a pang of guilt. Amanda was right even if it was in her own twisted and haunting way.

Nikita looked at Alex and received a reassuring smile. She felt so proud of her that even in such difficult situations; Alex would put up her smile just to make her feel better.

"Do you want to hear her voice? We can arrange that!" Amanda added with a devious smile. Nikita saw as Amanda lifted a transparent bottle filled with some transparent liquid. Her heart ached and felt heavy as she heard Alex trying hard to control her screams and groans.

Birkhoff felt sick at how low Amanda could go to torture someone. He felt sorry for Alex for being caught up and used as a revenge toy by Amanda to hurt Nikita.

"What are you doing?" Nikita yelled as she saw Alex trying to control her screams. She didn't know what Amanda was doing to Alex and why Alex was so adamant at not screaming out.

"You wanted to hear her voice. I'm helping you with that. Come on, scream Alex. Scream for Nikita." Amanda said as she grinned. Nikita watched the bottle go empty on Alex's back and Amanda throwing it away a little frustrated.

Sean was just going to yell at Amanda, but stopped when Alex's groans became louder as Amanda pressed her finger in her arm. He knew that Alex wouldn't want more people to break in front of Amanda. He knew that watching Nikita fall apart was already painful for Alex.

"Amanda! Stop it!" Nikita yelled again as her tears started to come up. Her heart and stomach felt tight and ached as she continued looking at Alex go through so much pain.

She knew that it was useless to tell Amanda to stop. "Alex please scream!" She yelled trying to convince Alex but it wasn't of any use to. Tears flowed down her face continuously as her tries to save Alex from the pain, failed again and again.

She looked as Amanda nodded at one of her guards as he splashed a bucket full of water over Alex. She felt like crying out loud and literally beg in front of Amanda to stop torturing Alex.

Alex's scream tore her apart. Everyone in Division could feel a hit of pain run through their bodies when Alex let out a terrifying scream when Amanda turned the knob of the batteries on. They all cursed Amanda for doing this to Alex.

Birkhoff's eyes went wide in terror when he heard Alex's scream. At times he had considered Alex to be even stronger than Nikita and now listening to her, screaming her lungs out was way more painful for him than he could ever imagine.

A dead silence flowed through the Ops when Alex finally went back to unconsciousness.

"See you tomorrow, Nikita." Amanda said her last words before switching the camera off and bringing a photo of Alex and her details back on the screen.

Ryan just stood there stunned. Everything that happened from start until now had left him speechless. The optimist Ryan was suddenly washed away. He couldn't even bring any words out of his mouth, forget trying to comfort anyone or get everyone to start working again.

Birkhoff blinked and looked around; everyone was staring at the screen. He felt sick at what Amanda was doing to Alex. _All this for a bet?_ He thought disgusted at how low Amanda could go to take her revenge from Nikita.

"I had told her to leave you and this sick place." Sean said and turned around to look at Nikita. She looked up at him confused. "After she took the bullet for you, I told her to just leave you and this place far behind and leave with me. But she wouldn't agree with me and chose you!" Sean said with his anger showing up in his voice.

"She chose you and look what she's going through now!" Sean yelled and pointed at the screen which once showed Alex getting tortured.

"Sean!" Michael yelled and stood besides Nikita putting an arm around her shoulder and pulling her closer. "We will find her. And it's not like she is enjoying watching Alex suffer." Michael added trying to calm him down. Sean looked at Nikita and then turned around frustrated.

Nikita just silently took Sean's accusations; it felt right, he accusations felt right. Alex was there because of her. If she would've pushed Alex to go away instead of telling her to stay and run Division with her, then Alex might not be with Amanda right now. She just wished if Alex would've gone away from Sean.

"Guys! Calm down. We don't need a fight over here. We are to find Alex and we will all do it together. We have to trust each other and not accuse each other. What has happened, it has happened. Now let's focus on what we have on our hands now." Ryan came up when he could finally find his optimistic self again. It was difficult for him to stay calm but he was trying his best to do so. He had to stay calm to keep this angry and broken bunch of people on track.

Everyone's attention turned to Ryan and waited for his orders. "Birkhoff, can you trace up the location?" Ryan asked looking at Birkhoff.

"Ummm... uh... uh..." Birkhoff tried to get words out of his mouth but his mind was stuck between Alex, his time as Amanda's hostage and the present time.

"Birkhoff!" Ryan yelled getting him back to present. He snapped and said, "Yeah... Maybe. But it'll take time, we'll try to find whatever we can from the last conversation but it'll take time." Birkhoff said.

"Sonya..." Birkhoff trailed off when he saw that Sonya was still staring at the screen. "Sonya?" He walked up to her and shook her. Sonya looked up at him with a confused gaze. "Alex..." Sonya trailed off.

"Yeah... I know. We will find her." Birkhoff said pulling her into a hug. He knew that Sonya isn't a person who can see so much violence. Especially seeing her friend go through so much was just going to be even more difficult.

It wasn't going to be easy for any of them but they had to stick together and work this out. They couldn't let cracks fall between them because if Amanda sees through the cracks then Alex would be paying for it.

"Nikita?" Sean said in a much calmer tone now. Nikita looked up at him confused about the change in his tone. "I'm sorry about what I said earlier. I... I was just... I didn't know how to react. And honestly, I'll never even be half of what you mean to Alex." Sean added. Nikita smiled hearing Sean's words. Listening that from Sean was the least expected things, especially during this time and it felt really good.

"I can understand. None of us were able to have a hold on ourselves once Amanda was gone." Nikita said and smiled.

"What the hell?" Birkhoff suddenly said in shock, grabbing everyone's and slowly got up from his seat in shock as he kept staring at his computer.

"What happened?" Michael asked confused.

**Hey guys! :D **

**I hope you liked the Division's POV of what happened in the last chapter. **

**And Nikalex and all my other awesome readers and reviewers don't hate me a lot for what I'm going to say ahead... But I don't know what to do about the ending. So suggestions are always welcomed for it! :D **

**And Ideas and suggestions about how you guys would like this story to go ahead or if you guys want to see something in this story; will always be welcomed! :D **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! :D **

**At last back with this update! **

**And of course! Nikalex! Thank you so much for your idea about the last chapter's cliff! :D And also to help me out with the Division part of this chapter! :D **

**CHAPTER 4**

"What the hell?" Birkhoff suddenly said in shock, grabbing everyone's and slowly got up from his seat in shock as he kept staring at his computer.

"What happened?" Michael asked confused. Birkhoff remained silent staring at the screen in front of him. His eyes filled with tears as he was trying hard to get in the new information.

* * *

Amanda turned around and nodded at one of her guards and he left the room for his assigned job. She then looked at Alex and noticed a few movements in her. She wasn't yet totally fallen into unconsciousness. Amanda walked up to her and lifted her head up by her hair.

"Such a worthless whore." Amanda said frustrated that she had used so many techniques till now to break her but still wasn't even close to it. And started walking towards the door.

"At least I have a family. You will never have it. Your evil will never let you have something remotely similar to family. And you calling me a worthless whore isn't going to change the fact that I have people who care about me. Your comments, these nightmares and torture... try it all. Nothing is going to make me turn into you. And even if you succeed, I know that I have a family that will bring me back from whatever I turn into. A family that loves me and will do anything to save me. A family that you cannot even imagine to have and you'll never have it." Alex said and took a moment to enjoy the pain in Amanda's eyes before continuing, "Or a family that you never had. Because if you had something even close to being called as a 'family' then you wouldn't be a psychopath bitch right now." Alex finished and grinned as anger built up in Amanda with every word of her last statement. She knew she had ticked Amanda off, she knew by her looks that she had hit a sensitive point.

Amanda towards Alex as her past memories flooded in her mind and tortured her. She caught Alex's head and tilted it back as their faces stood just inches away. "Don't you dare talk to me like that. You have no idea about me or my past. And you call them a family? What kind of a family is that? A family where Nikita would choose Michael over you? A family where Nikita couldn't even recognize that her so called daughter/sister is relapsing? A family in which Sean just leaves you to relapse? A family which consists of broken and damaged people? It isn't a family, Alex. It's just a bunch of broken, damaged and battered people who think that they can save the world but in reality, they can't even save their loved ones." Amanda said as she looked into Alex's eyes with pure hate.

"Broken, damaged and battered... Whatever you call them but I know that I'll have each and every one of them at every step of my life. But you... Who do you have Amanda?" Alex grinned and continued, "Ari?" She laughed as she saw an unusual pain and hatred in Amanda's eyes.

"You're just a lonely bitch Amanda. You're nothing more than a psychopath who loves to cause pain to people just because she is jealous of them." Alex said.

Anger rose inside of Amanda. Alex had pushed her buttons and now there was no going back to the calm Amanda.

"Guards!" Amanda yelled in anger and two guards came running inside.

"Take her away to the main room and hang her up to the ceiling." Amanda yelled as she let Alex's hair go in anger. Anger had taken over her. Her memories of her childhood rushed into her mind. She walked towards the table where she had kept a glass and a bottle of whiskey to use it on Alex. She poured herself a glass and gulped it down in a second. She shot 3 more glasses down her throat before straightening herself up again and leaving the room with Alex's words and her past still playing in her head.

* * *

"What the hell?" Birkhoff suddenly said in shock, grabbing everyone's and slowly got up from his seat in shock as he kept staring at his computer.

"What happened?" Michael asked confused. Birkhoff remained silent staring at the screen in front of him. His eyes filled with tears as he was trying hard to get in the new information.

Michael noticed Birkhoff's shocked face and he decided to go and check by himself what had put Birkhoff in a state like that. He moved closer to him with a small reassuring smile on his face. "Are you ok?" Michael asked softly and stared at him. "No." Birkhoff replied with shaking voice and pointed to the screen in front of him.

Michael confused turned his gaze from Birkhoff to the screen. What he saw, was something that he never expected. His heart ached and his stomach felt tight as his eyes started burning with unshed tears understanding why Birkhoff was in so shock. "What the fuck?" Michael yelled frustrated unable to form any other words.

"Guys?" Ryan and Sean asked in union confused.

"Does anyone care to tell us what is going on?" Nikita asked as calmly as she could. Michael got out of his shock state when he heard Nikita's voice. He couldn't let her see what he was seeing, it was going to kill her, break her into tiny pieces that she won't be able to put together for a long time. "Nothing, honey." Michael replied and gestured to Birkhoff to delete what they were seeing.

Just when all of them were going to come to the computer and have a look at it Birkhoff spoke up, "Yeah guys, it's nothing. Some important files got deleted by mistake. It's okay... I'll take care of it."

Birkhoff started typing in hurry trying to protect the others from this sick game. "It's about Alex, isn't it?" Nikita asked with grave voice and tears in her eyes. "Is that about Alex?" Nikita asked again with hate and pain radiating from her voice, when Birkhoff and Michael didn't reply.

Birkhoff snapped and looked up at her. She was determined to know the truth now, if whatever caused them that shock was related with Alex, she wanted to know, she needed some type of closure. 'I'm sorry.' Birkhoff mouthed.

"Michael, is that has something to do with Alex or Amanda?" Sean asked firmly trying hard to keep his voice stable and started to walk towards the computer losing his patience.

"Nerd!" Nikita yelled offended and started walking towards the computer. She knew she wasn't going to receive an answer from them, so she had to find out by herself. They didn't have the right to keep something like that away from her.

Michael sighed defeated and stepped in front of them. "You should really not see that. It is just one more of Amanda's sick games." Michael tried to reason them.

Birkhoff looked at her with an apologetic gaze before he pressed ENTER and stood up, straightening his back.

"I am sorry, Nikita." Birkhoff said honestly but he didn't regret his attempt to protect Nikita."Move away." Nikita ordered with a deadly tone. Michael obeyed instantly and he took two steps back.

Nikita walked further and sat on Birkhoff's chair and started typing furious. In operations there was complete silence. After 3 minutes Nikita smiled sadly and turned to face Birkhoff. "You taught me well, nerd" Nikita said softly as she pressed ENTER and the deleted message popped up back on the screen. Birkhoff tried to stop her but she was stubborn.

She turned her face to look at the files that he was trying so hard to keep away from her. Her heart became cold, her eyes burned with tears, she fist her hand in frustration as she finally had a look at those files. "I am going to kill her." Nikita said through gritted teeth before she paid her undivided attention to what she was seeing.

Amanda had sent a message for the team about which, she was sure that it will take its effect. She had sent them a photo of the main torture room. The room was damn creepy. It has tables, chairs, bed, chains in the walls, chains from the ceiling, cross, torture tolls, drugs, horsewhips, metals, globs, everything that could cause pain to a person. The walls and the floor were covered with blood, some blood was fresh and Nikita assumed that it was Alex's blood. On the picture there was a message from Amanda that made Nikita's hate grew bigger. Amanda had written on the photo...

'_Don't be shy, play with us... Choose a place... Where should I place Alex tomorrow? Table? Cross? Chains? We have already tried the others but we don't mind to repeat them... We had a great time! Come on, pick a place!"  
On the bottom of the photo there was another message from Amanda.  
"Do you wanna bet? How long is she going to last? How much pain can a human being endure? I will hear your predictions in the next call! Have a nice day, Division. We will have a wonderful day for sure..."_

"Alex will be fine. We will get her back." Michael tried to comfort Nikita but he knew that he wasn't going to be successful at it.

"In what state?" Nikita whispered hurt. She couldn't believe what was happening. Her mind was flashing back to their video call with Amanda. Alex was obviously tortured mercilessly, not only physically but also mentally and emotionally. She wasn't with Amanda more than a day but Amanda had managed to torture in more than one way for her own reasons, for a bet, as Amanda had chosen to call it.

Michael wanted to say something to comfort Nikita, to reassure her that Alex will be fine, safe and sound in her arms again but he couldn't. He couldn't make a promise like that to Nikita, not after what he saw on Birkhoff's screen.

Sean walked up towards them and even before Michael could make a last try to at least save him from the pain, he was pushed away.

After what he saw on the big screen and Nikita's reaction to Birkhoff's screen, Ryan wasn't sure if he wanted to see it. He stood there but his curiosity made him want to have a look at it. He walked up after Sean but was stopped by Michael. "Trust me." Michael tried to convince him. He knew that no matter how optimistic Ryan tried to be, but right now he was cracking too. "I need to do it." Ryan assured him. Michael sighed and moved away. Alex was his friend too and he had the rights to know what his friend was going through.

Sean looked at the screen and dug his fingers in Birkhoff's chair. "She has to pay for this." Sean said. Nikita could feel the pain in his voice; she turned and looked up at him. "She will. We will make her pay." Nikita reassured him.

Ryan looked at the photo in complete shock. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to keep the team moving, how to help them. "All that for a bet?" Ryan managed to whisper trying to keep his voice stable, void of any emotion. "What bet is worthy so much pain?" Nikita added Ryan's thoughts.

"This…. This isn't about Nikita or Ari!" Birkhoff shouted frustrated, finally out of his shock.

"This is personal." Michael sighed.

"She has to be brought back! I don't know what they have put or why Amanda is so obsessed but Nikita, you have to talk to Alex and persuade her to give up. Let Amanda win. I don't care. I want her back!" Sean yelled trying to keep his tears back.

"We will get her back…" Ryan tried to reassure everyone even if he didn't feel like that. He was devastated.

"How much do you think that a human can last Ryan? How much pain before they give up? How much emotional and mental torture? We are talking about Amanda, here. She hasn't lost a minute from her precious time with Alex. How many broken bones Alex or anyone can endure? How many cuts or electroshocks? How many mental games? For how many hours Alex can keep dreaming of whatever Amanda wants her to and keep having a hold on to the reality? She is HUMAN! She has limits!" Nikita shouted and stood up.

"I know Nikita, I know. But Alex is strong. She is the strongest person that we all know. We need to have faith in her, we need to keep ourselves together because she will need us more than anything." Ryan tried to reason them.

"What the hell Ryan? Did we all watch the same video? Did we all see Alex's eyes after her nightmare, the pain, the betrayal, the hurt and the fear that were written in them? Did you see the same video where Amanda kept torturing Alex and in the end she electro shocked her with 1000 fucking volt of electricity? Do you know what 1000 volt means, Ryan? Did we see the same fucking video? Because if we did see the same video and if the same photo, you need to tell me how the hell you are freaking calm and how the hell you are so damn optimistic! Because, I can't! I can't see the bright side of the story when Alex is being tortured like that for A BET!" Sonya yelled out. She wasn't the one to yell out like that or even have the courage to order someone. But right now... she was just scared. Scared for Alex, scared for what will happen after Alex would come back, scared to even think about what Amanda would've done to Alex while they didn't have eyes on her. She was scared to death as her friend, the one who she could go and talk to was out there somewhere in this world getting tortured or maybe even dying. Except for Birkhoff if she could talk to someone freely then it was Alex and she couldn't imagine losing her.

All of them looked at Sonya shocked. They had never thought that Sonya could even yell at anyone. She was always so calm and quiet and reserved. She didn't used to talk more than necessary and today she was yelling her lungs out at Ryan. No one knew that Sonya was so attached to Alex that all of this could have this kind of an impact on her.

"Sonya?" Birkhoff asked in shock. His sweet and gentle Sonya had just yelled at Ryan and it was a situation that he couldn't even think of. He knew Sonya was panicked, she was scared, he knew what Alex means to Sonya. He knew that Sonya doesn't attach herself a lot to people but even in that small amount she cared about Alex a lot.

"I... I am sorry. I'm just... scared. I haven't seen so much of torture and blood and I'm... just..." Sonya couldn't find words, she felt out of character to yell at someone but she couldn't place her mind at one specific point.

"It's okay... I can understand, you don't need to explain." Ryan said calmly once he was out of his shock and then continued to explain, "I am calm because someone has to. Alex needs us. She was strong for us in the video and we need to be strong for her. She needs us, she needs us now and she will need us later. We will get her back and we will help her deal with Amanda's aftermath. If we give up right here right now, then Alex is going to suffer more. If we let Amanda see vulnerability, Alex will pay for that. If we fall apart, Alex's fight will be for nothing. ALEX NEEDS US! She goes through hell but she is alive and we don't mourn the alive! We find them and rescue them and help them recover but we don't mourn from them. Stop acting like Alex is dead and use your hurt and pain and hate to find her and help her. SHE IS ALIVE! Put that into your gorgeous minds of yours and let's get out girl back."

He looked at everyone as he spoke. A tornado was rushing around inside his head but he knew that he had to stay calm for Alex and for them. He knew that he had to lead this crazy, angry and broken bunch of assassins. And by the looks of Sonya and Birkhoff, he was sure that they wouldn't hesitate too if they got a chance to put a bullet in Amanda's head. He had to find a way out to deal with this. He had to find a way to get Alex back, ALIVE! All he knew was that if anything happens to Alex then all of them would be shattered to pieces. But honestly he didn't knew how long he would be able to have a hold on himself too.

**Hey guys! :D I hope you liked this chapter! :D **

**Thanks for coming back and all the reviews till now and for the once that you'll give! :D **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey guys! :D **

**Enjoy the chapter! :D **

**CHAPTER 5**

Alex grinned as Amanda let her head go, she could feel the hurt and pain going through Amanda's head. She was glad that she had pushed her buttons. She didn't care about what was going to happen later to her.

She tilted her head back to have one last look at her enemy who had given herself up to whiskey, before the guards dragged her out. She felt a feeling of victory to see that pain in Amanda.

Pain was coursing through her each vein and especially her right arm as the guards roughly dragged her body down the stairs and through the hallway. Her happiness slowly started to fade away and fear took its place; that she couldn't show was taking its palace.

Memories of the time when she was last in this place came rushing back into her head as she saw the room again.

She winced when the guards threw her on the floor and dragged the thick heavy chains down from the air and wrapped around her body.

* * *

Amanda smashed the glass down on the table. Her screams and memories running through her head with Alex's words dominating her emotions. She just couldn't shut it off and her anger grew with every step that she took down the stairs and though the hallway.

She felt a sudden and unusual calmness run through her body as she placed her hand on the knob. She twisted, opening it and grinned as she saw Alex perfectly hanging there up in the air. Thick heavy chains wrapped around her hands, upper body and legs firmly holding her up in the air.

"Leave." Amanda said and the guards obeyed her immediately. Alex looked at her grinned but inside she was confused about the sudden pride in Amanda.

"What's that pride about?" Alex asked. Her right arm sent waves of pain through her body as it her up in the air. Her body begged her to stop pissing Amanda off but her mind and heart couldn't stop thinking about how much pain Amanda made her family go through.

Amanda trailed her fingers on Alex's right arm and stopped at the gunshot wound. "Not pride; pleasure. It's the pleasure that I'm feeling looking at you so weak. You did press my buttons a few minutes ago. I was angry, when you talked to me like that and it kept on increasing as I came here. But now when I look at you so vulnerable…" Amanda paused and pressed her thumb on the wound making Alex groan in pain. "….weak…." more pressure; louder groans, "….in pain…." -More pressure- "...broken..." -More pressure if it was even possible- "You just played the wrong move, Alex. You're going to pay for it." Amanda finished and

Alex bit her lip as she heard Amanda's words and suffered through the pain in her arm. She could taste her blood as she tried hard to control her screams. She was already scratched, electrocuted, used as a punching bag and was made to go through nightmares for hours. Holding back her screams already when she is in so much pain; was getting more and more difficult.

Alex winced as the waves didn't stop. Her hand, her broken ribs gave her enough pain to make her scream out the next time Amanda caused her pain.

"I'm weak? Vulnerable? Broken? In pain?" Alex laughed. "Look at you Amanda! Just made a small comment on your family and you went away to have a drink. You're just a weak little bitch. The only one broken or in pain is you, Amanda. It's you who is vulnerable, weak, in pain and broken. And if there's anyone who is suffering or is breaking, then that you." Alex said and grinned but it soon faded off as anger rose again inside Amanda and punched her. Her body jolted back and forth from the force and kept her swing as Amanda turned away and walked towards the batteries.

"I think you miss the pain a lot." Amanda grinned and turned the knob, coursing 1000 volts of currents through Alex's body.

Alex bit her lips and tried hard to keep her screams inside but lost. She screamed her lungs out soon.

* * *

5, 10, 12, 15, 20…. And then Alex lost the count of how many rounds she went through. She wondered how many she had already and how many more she would have. She had no idea how many she had already gone through. Her head felt light and as soon as she fell unconscious, more pain would course through her body from the currents, jolting her up. Her voice was coarse from screaming, but yet she didn't stop to piss Amanda off. She enjoyed watching the pain and anger in Amanda's eyes.

Alex breathed heavily as another round of shock ended. The count was unknown but the pain was unbearable. She needed a break. She was being tortured since hours now. But she knew that Amanda wasn't going to stop anytime soon.

She sighed when she saw Amanda walk away from batteries and towards her. Amanda pierced her fingers and in Alex's cheeks forcing her to look up.

Amanda felt like banging this girl's head and smashing each and every bone of hers. Alex had pressed all her buttons. The continuous comments on her past made her angry out of limits. No one had dared to talk to her like that. Alex had to pay for that. She had to know that no one can talk to her like that.

"You've made a mistake by dragging my past between us Alex. I think it's time since you've met your broken family." Amanda said and Alex's eyes grew wide. She knew she looked more than a wreck and even the sight of her is going to break her family. She didn't want this to happen.

"Mistake?" Alex scoffed. "Who said? I enjoyed every second of it. That look of hurt and anger on your face every time I commented; priceless and worth for every pain. And look who's talking about a broken family. What was it with you Amanda? Daddy issues?" Alex grinned and earned a slap. She would go through the pain all day or night or whatever it was. But she didn't want her family to look at her. "I'll take that as a yes. So what did the big daddy do to the tiny little Amanda huh?" Alex grinned. Amanda punched her in her broken ribs making the girl's body jolt in pain and swing.

Amanda grabbed Alex's hair and their cold gaze met with more firmness. "You don't even know a word about what I've gone through Alex. And now I'm going to make sure that you'll beg to me for everything that I tell you to." Amanda and punched Alex again and again before walking away.

"I'm never going to beg to a bitch like you!" Alex growled to Amanda's back.

"We'll see that." Amanda grinned and walked away to the table and picked up the scissors and a blow torch.

Alex's eyes widened looking at the blow torch and tried to move away but it wasn't of any use. She didn't have any energy to make her body; with those heavy chance, move all by herself.

Amanda grinned and cut the sleeves of her T-shirt and pulled it out from the chain with all her strength and cut the remaining part to it get away from her body totally.

Alex arched her body when her T-shirt was ripped away from her back, burning the cuts on her back.

Alex's heart raced as she heard the sound of flames roaring from the blowtorch. She screamed as she the chains heated up through the blow torch. Amanda slowly heated up the chain which was wrapped around her back from her waist and then went up to her hands. She grinned as Alex screams grew louder. The chains weren't the only cause of her burns, but her skin also burned due to the fire that touched her skin through the holes on chains and due to her constant movements.

Alex's screams replaced her memories and screams that ran through her head and calmed her down. She didn't want to show any mercy to the girl hanging in front of her. She just wanted to cause Alex and her family pain. Her anger wouldn't let her think straight. Alex had made her anger rise to just a different sadistic level.

Alex went on groaning, crying and screaming in pain. "Beg me to stop! Beg to me for my forgivenss!" Amanda yelled as she continued to run the blowtorch over the chains.

Alex hated herself for this, but she couldn't take the increasing heat anymore. "Stop! Please! Please! Stop! Stop! Stop it! I beg you to stop it! I beg you! I beg of you to stop it!" Alex screamed her lungs out, but when Amanda didn't stop, she finally gave in begging for her forgiveness, "I beg you to forgive me! I made a mistake! I shouldn't have said those things! I beg you to forgive me! please! Please! Please forgive me!" Alex cried and screamed and Amanda stopped. "See… Wasn't it easy? You just have to beg to me Alex. And now, beg to me to cause pain to your family." Amanda said as she walked forward and stood in front of Alex.

"Never." Alex growled and screamed again as the chains against her waist started to heat up. Sweat grew on her body more and more as the chains not only burnt her back and waist but her whole body was getting heated up.

"Beg to me! Beg to me to hurt your so called family!" Amanda yelled and continued moving the blow torch over the chains. Alex tried hard not to scream but she knew it wasn't of any use. She didn't want her family to look at her in this condition. She screamed, groaned and cried but wasn't ready yet to give up into begging. It burned her out of limits. As the chain heated more and more, it dug deeper inside her flesh.

A part of Amanda wished that Alex goes on without begging for a longer time. And the other part wanted to hurt Nikita and was growing impatient for Alex's begging.

Amanda brought it back to the hottest part of the chain and stopped there. Alex screamed her lungs out and tried to stay as still as she could as her movements would cause more parts of her skin to burn. She could feel her blood run down from the burns on her back and waist. It was getting more and more difficult and she finally gave into begging.

"Okay! Okay! I lose!" Alex cried.

"Beg to me!" Amanda said. "Yes! Yes! I beg of you to hurt my family! Please! Please hurt my family! Please! I want you to hurt my family! Just hurt them! Hurt Nikita, Sean, Michael whoever you like! Hurt them!" Alex screamed her lungs out. She hated herself for yelling those words out but the burns and heat was going out of her limits. She was a human and she had limits.

Amanda took the blowtorch away as she heard Alex scream. She wouldn't mind to go on, but she knew that it was time now to call Nikita and enjoy her pain too. The feeling of victory washed away all her pain and hurt.

Alex sighed that Amanda took the blowtorch away but it wasn't going to be enough. The chains continued burning her body. Sweat ran down her forehead, face, waist and arms. Her whole body felt like it was on fire as the burns radiated the heat.

"Guards!" Amanda yelled and two men came rushing inside and stood next to her.

"Let her go and place her in the chair." Amanda grinned.

The guards unlocked the chain and let her fall to the ground. She screamed out again as the chains spread below her burning her arms, gunshot wound and chest. She quickly rolled over and laid down on her back, on the cold concrete floor. It wasn't a total relief but it did make it a little better for her.

But her enjoyment just lasted a few seconds as the men grabbed her hands, not caring about her wounds. She groaned and screamed out a little. Her body was still on fire and the guards didn't care about her wounds at all. They threw her in the chair and she groaned and coughed as the handle of the chair hit her ribs. She caught her ribs in pain and tried to catch her breath. She was in more pain than what she imagined Amanda would put her in. The guards grabbed her hands and cuffed them to handles and stood up waiting for more instructions.

"Get the equipments." Amanda ordered and the guards left to get the equipment. Amanda walked over to her and sat on the table besides Alex. She stared at Alex in silence and enjoyed her view.

Alex let her head fall down but she could feel Amanda's gaze on her. Her burns still made her want to scream and cry but she wouldn't let it out. She knew she was going to scream, cry and probably even beg to Amanda again. She just whimpered at times and sobbed as her the spread the heat in her whole body. Her head ached till no limits and felt like it weighed her ton. She wanted to just leave her whole body and go and cry somewhere. For the first time now, she felt like breaking down. She wouldn't care even if it would be in front of Amanda but she just wanted to stop this and cry her heart out. She wanted to go back into the safe arms of her family. She just wanted to stop acting in front of Amanda that she was strong even when she would be crying like a kid inside of her. She wanted to escape but in the condition she was in, she doubted if she could even walk 5 steps on her own.

Amanda lifted her head up by her chin and supported it, making Alex look into her eyes. "Was it all worth it? You taunting me? And that resulting into this? Look at you Alex. You're such a mess. Why risk the pain when you could've silently fallen unconscious and have some much needed rest?" Amanda asked. She enjoyed watching Alex in so much pain but somewhere somehow also felt pity for her. But she wouldn't let that feeling over power her evil. Alex was still her enemy and she wasn't planning to show any mercy on her or her family.

"Why do you care?" Alex snarled and took her head back from Amanda's sift grip. Amanda slapped her across her face and calmly asked, "You really want to piss me off right now?"

Alex knew Amanda was right. She sighed and nodded. "For the pain that I could see in your eyes, for the hint of humanity that I could see in your eyes, yes it was worth it." Alex said and looked at the door which opened again and a laptop and a few devices were brought in.

"Then how are you any better than me Alex, if you wanted to cause me pain too?" Amanda asked trying keep her head cool. She wanted to calm herself back before connecting with Nikita.

"I'm better than you because try to give me pain just for your own sadistic pleasure. But I had my own reasons. Yes, I did it for the pain that you gave to my family and me but when I saw that pain in your eyes, I saw that you were a human too. An innocent. I liked watching that pain because it was the only human thing that I ever saw in you. Why Amanda? Why did you give yourself up to the evil?" Alex asked. She knew that there was a time when Amanda did feel about her more than just a student. Far away from a daughter but on the path of it. If there was a possibility that Amanda could be brought back to humanity and saved, then Alex would gladly like to take that chance. Even if she had to go through pain for it, she would try to bring that humanity and innocence back in Amanda.

"There's no humanity left in me, Alex. And I'm going to make sure that I prove that to you today. My past is what made me and I am proud of what I've become. I don't want to go back to what I was and I'll never go back to it. I can't be weak like you and your family. Love is a weakness Alex." Amanda said coldly and nodded at the guard. He typed a few things away on the laptop and attached the devices to it, to prevent tracking as Amanda uncuffed Alex's right hand and then cuffed it with handle that was affixed on the top of the table.

"It's ready." The man said and Amanda nodded. "You can leave now." Amanda ordered and the man followed her orders, leaving the laptop and the attached gadgets on the small table in front of Alex.

Alex's hopes of getting Amanda back faded away when Amanda prepped her up. "Amanda..." Alex said in a soft and polite tone and softly grabbed Amanda's hand. "What was it? What made you this today? I saw that you cared about me when you asked about my intentions..." Alex stopped when Amanda took her hand away. "It wasn't care, Alex. It was pity. I felt pity at how much you love your so called family and went through so much pain for them. But when it would come to choosing their partners and you, you'll always be the one to suffer. You're the only one who's going to lose and who's going to broken, Alex." Amanda said coldly.

Amanda bent down looked at her straight into her eyes and whispered, "You're nothing more than a revenge toy to me, stuck in between Nikita and me. Don't get mistaken that I have any kind of feelings for you, Alex. I don't care about you and get that straight into your pretty little head and don't try to play that 'humanity' game on me again."

"And now..." Amanda trailed of and pressed the enter button, sending a call to Division.

**Hey! I hope you've liked this chapter! :D **

**And I'm sorry if I was very cruel to Alex but I wanted her to have her first break down. **

**I hope you guys have somehow managed to enjoy and like this chapter! :D **

**Thank you for all your awesome reviews! :D Keep reviewing and reading! More and More exciting stuff will be coming up! :D **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys! Nope I hadn't abandoned the story. And I'm really happy to be able to update again. Of course Nikalex had to kick my ass to get me to start typing as I had lost the will to type for a while but anyway... I have it back thanks to her.**

**And thanks to her ideas and inputs this chapter is a lot better than what I could've ever pieced it together. **

**Yup. The longest one I've ever updated. Of course with her help, but yeah. :P**

**Yup, by now you guys would've guessed it but still. I would love to say it that Nikalex is the co-writer for this story and I am so happy to her by my side, helping me out with this story. **

**Thank you Nikalex for your help until now for this story and the previous one and also for the future chapters and stories.****  
**

**Haven't re-read it properly but I think it should all be okay. If not then Im extremely sorry. And please do tell me if there are some big mistakes. :)**

**Chapter 6**

"Birkhoff..." Ryan was cut off when Birkhoff yelled, "I'm getting her; Amanda is calling." He was anxious and scared as to know why Amanda came back before time. It wasn't 'tomorrow' yet, but she was still here calling them.

He looked at Michael and he nodded at him, encouraging him to accept the call. He nodded back and yelled out, "I want EVERYONE on their toes to trace the call! Do anything, you have full access to anything that you want but we HAVE TO find her!" He took a deep breath and pressed enter.

"We will get her." Sonya whispered calmly and placed her hand on his shoulder trying to comfort him, before the call could actually connect.

"Hello, Division..." Amanda's grin pasted face appeared on the big screen.

They couldn't see Alex anywhere, but could hear low groans and whimpers in the background. As if someone was under continuous pain and they clearly knew who that 'someone' would be.

"Where is Alex?" Sean stepped up. He was sick of Amanda's games and just wanted his Alex back. He had decided that once Alex is back, he is going to take her far away from this sick place and life. He wouldn't listen a word of protest from her.

"Sean..." Amanda said and tilted her head on her left.

"Just get her on the damn screen." Michael growled.

"Relax, Michael. You would definitely like to keep a check on your manners." Amanda grinned.

Michael closed his eyes and took a deep breath, hoping to calm down. "Can we meet Alex, please?" Michael asked as calmly and politely as he could.

"Not perfect, but better." Amanda said and moved out of the way.

"You're ready?" Amanda grinned testing their patience.

"Just get her!" Nikita said and gave her a cold murderous gaze.

"As you wish." Amanda shrugged and moved away, revealing Alex handcuffed to the chair.

Their breaths stopped and tears rolled down the eyes of a few. The whole of Ops went silent as they saw Alex's bloody, bruised and burnt body.

Birkhoff's knees gave up and he fell into his chair as Sonya kept on staring. Michael clenched his fists and gritted his teeth as Nikita's tears ran freely ran down her face continuously. Sean clenched his fist and controlled his tears with unimaginable power as Ryan stood there in shock as his cracks grew wider.

It killed Alex to see them in so much pain. She bit her tongue, clenched her fist and joined every bit of her will power together to hold her groans and whimpers and her want to cry out in front of her family inside. She knew she couldn't talk. If she talked, it will only result in crying out to her family and she knew she couldn't do that. She couldn't let them go through more torture just because she couldn't take the pain. She had to control it.

Her whole body felt like it was on fire. Sweat ran down her body and into her burns, making it worse for her. She cursed herself for giving Amanda the permission to hurt her family; she hated herself to give up.

Nikita felt anger coursing through her each and every vein as she balled her fists and kept it tight. Anger radiated her eyes as she glared at Amanda and grinded her teeth. "You Bitch" She growled raising her voice. "You are going to pay for this. This is way too low for you Amanda." She continued further. "Relax Nikita." Amanda's calm and relaxed tone irritated her nerves further.

Her fist relaxed and more tears rolled down her eyes when she heard Alex whisper her name. "Alex..." Nikita trailed of in response. She couldn't go on further. Talking to Alex, listening her weak voice... That look on Alex's face. It all tortured her. She wished for each scar on Alex's body to come on hers and leave Alex body.

She closed her eyes and Alex's strong voice ran in her head telling her to stay strong. She took a deep breath and saw up again.

"What do you want Amanda?" Nikita asked calmly trying to have a hold on herself. From the corner of her eyes she could see her most optimistic friend, Ryan breaking apart. It scared her. She had never seen him like that, not even in the worst of the situations. While Sean, even with his back faced to her, she could feel the anger that was running through him. Michael's side face never looked scarier. Not even during their cold wars due to his hand.

Her attention shifted back to Amanda when replied, "I just want you on your knees Nikita. Begging. Begging to me to hurt Alex." Amanda grinned.

"This is not a fucking game! It is Alex! She is a human and not some toy! You want your revenge then have the balls to come up and hurt me!" Nikita yelled as anger and frustration ran through each every fiber in her body. She couldn't beg Amanda to hurt It was her Alex! She couldn't do it, but she knew that in the end she will probably do whatever Amanda wanted her to.

Amanda grinned as she saw the opportunity to hurt Nikita and she could see Alex shift uncomfortably in the chair. She softly placed her hand on Alex's bare shoulder.

Pain of fear and goose bumps ran through her body as Amanda's hand touched her skin. She just wanted to run away from there. She didn't want Amanda's touch. She winced as Amanda's long nail of her pointer finger ran over the burning skin besides her burns, making it worse.

You see these burns?" Amanda asked she trailed her finger on the skin surrounding the burns on Alex's chest and waist. "Don't you touch them! Take your hands off!" Michael growled.

"So much pain... and for what? FOR NOTHING... I will be honest with you, Michael, I don't think that I have tortured someone so much in my life and I must admit that I really enjoyed it pushing her limits like that... I will be fair, she is strong, stronger than any of you but I am not even close to be done with her and I will make it sure that when I am done, I will have taken what I want from her..." Amanda trailed of and pressed her thumb on the skin making it bleed more and Alex wince before bending down near her ear to whisper, "I told you I don't have any humanity left."

"You're trying to prove that to me or yourself?" Alex whispered back in a strong and firm voice as she looked into Amanda's eyes. Amanda stared at her but didn't know what to answer. She didn't know the answer to Alex's questions. Alex grinned at Amanda's speechlessness and earned a hard slap across her face.

"I still wait your predictions, guys. How much longer is she going to last?" Amanda said turning her attention to team Nikita. She enjoyed to see them in pain, she enjoyed seeing the tears in their eyes, she enjoyed hearing the pain and the fear in their voice, she enjoyed seeing them broken and vulnerable in their mercy.

"She is going to last more than you can think. You cannot break her and you will never be able to break her! She is our Alex and we have full faith in her to go on!" Sonya yelled. She was tired and hurt from seeing Alex go through so much pain just so that her family, especially Nikita would have to go through pain.

Alex averted her gaze from the camera hurt thinking of how her condition was putting her family in pain, how her sweet and calm Sonya was the one yelling at Amanda, how much they were hurt. She couldn't stop blaming herself for this as tears freely ran down her eyes. She just wished to be hanged from that ceiling again and feel the burn again but not give up like that.

"Obviously, Alex will last more than you over there... what a pity... she is the one who suffer, you are the one who break..." Amanda said amused. "Alex, explain to them how you gained all those burns..." Amanda ordered Alex firmly. Alex kept her gaze away from the camera, fixed on the wall in the other end of the room, her gaze was void of any emotion, she wasn't going to put her family in more pain... she wasn't going to play Amanda's game. Amanda bent down near Alex's near and whispered, "Tell them how you tried to protect them from my games, tell them how you turned your body into my personal punching bag just because you wanted to protect them, to spare them some pain... tell them that you screamed and cried and begged in front of me... tell them what you went through just to protect them... tell them how much you love them, how much you suffer because you chose to stay with them... tell them how you could have ended everything hours ago just by joining me... tell them" Amanda's evil whisper made Alex clench her jaw but she didn't reply at all, her figure was empty of any emotion.

Amanda slapped Alex's face hard. Alex groaned a little and then she turned her face away from Amanda and spitted some blood. With courage, she turned her face back to Amanda and caught Amanda's eyes in a silent conversation.

"Don't expect any mercy from me, Alex" Amanda whispered. "I don't WANT your mercy... so go ahead... enjoy yourself, satisfy your evil, break me..." Alex retorted firmly. "First, I will break Nikita..." Amanda said grinning and she was determined to break Nikita.

"You're just sadistic bitch Amanda. I'm-" "Enough of your speeches Nikita." Amanda interrupted her.

"You'll do as I say or you know who's going to pay for it." Amanda grinned and looked at Alex as with the other hand, she silently picked up the scalpel from the table and hid it well behind her hand.

Nikita sighed in defeat. She knew that Alex will be the one to pay for her wrong moves. Actually, no matter what her moves would be, they will be wrong. Alex was going to go through pain no matter if she did as Amanda told her to or not.

"What do you want me to do Amanda?" Nikita asked as calmly as she could.

"You're going to beg to her. Beg to her to tell you how she got those burns. Because I'm sure she's not going to get it out willingly." Amanda said and looked at Alex.

"Don't even try Nikita. I'm not going to say anything." Alex said firmly. She didn't want Nikita to beg in front of her, holding herself up right now was getting difficult. Watching her family breakdown piece by piece in front of her... Because of her was itself a torture.

"Alex..." "I said don't Nikita." Alex said and looked back at her. Fresh tears could easily be seen on her cheeks.

"If you want to make it better for me, then you'll not ask me to talk about it no matter what Amanda does to persuade you. Please just don't make it even worse. You know it that I would go through more pain than letting you go through more pain through my words." Alex said firmly. She was telling the truth.

Nikita knew Alex wasn't lying. She battled between caring about Alex's emotional pain and Alex's physical pain.

"How is it going to make a difference Alex? If you say it, then we get hurt and if Amanda makes you go through more pain, and then too we will be hurt. So it's better to let it out Alex." Nikita said in a pleading voice.

"Trust me, it'll make a difference. I want you to not talk to me about this Nikita. Not now. Please. I beg of you for that." Alex said as she tried to keep her voice as strong and steady as she could. She knew she would cry if she talked to Nikita about it.

Nikita saw Alex's want in her eyes and decided to stay strong and follow Alex's wish.

She nodded telling Alex that she is not going to ask her about it.

"You are so weak, Alex. Such a pity." Amanda said and stabbed the scalpel in her thigh.

Alex looked up at the ceiling and whimpered and bit her lip and tongue but didn't scream as Amanda twisted the scalpel inside her thigh.

They all stood in silence as Alex's whimpers tortured them. Alex had told them to stay strong and that was what they were going to do. If she wanted them to stay strong then they would stay strong, or at least try.

Amanda looked at them and grinned she knew it was all an act; an act about staying strong. She pulled the knife out and Alex relaxed a bit. The pain was still there but at least the scalpel wasn't there.

"What do you think Alex? If you deny Nikita to persuade you talk about the burns then I'll not be able to get her on her knees?" Amanda grinned and looked back at the camera.

"If I'll want her on her knees then I'll have her on her knees.

"She'll not go down on her knees!" Alex said raising her voice with every word.

"You'll not go down on your knees Nikita? You'll choose your pride over Alex?" Amanda asked and looked at Nikita.

"I. Will. Always. Choose. Alex!" Nikita yelled at the end.

"Then go down on your knees and beg to me. Beg to me to hurt Alex." Amanda grinned.

"What!?" Nikita and Sean exclaimed.

"Are you denying my wish Nikita?" Amanda asked sarcastically and placed her hand on Alex's gunshot wound.

"Don't even think about it. You aren't going to beg to her!" Alex said and groaned and twisted her body in pain. For anyone else, Alex would be just groaning because of her wound being crushed between Amanda's fingers but for Alex, she was groaning not only because of her hand, but also her head, chest, thighs, back and every part of her body hurt her. Slightest of movements caused jolts of pain to go through her whole body. She relaxed back in the chair when Amanda stopped torturing her hand and waited for the pain to slow down as she kept her eyes shut.

She shot open her eyes as her head twisted to her side from the force of Amanda's hand. "You should learn to keep your mouth shut unless you're asked to speak up." Amanda said and glared at her. "What about you keeping your mouth shut, Bitch!" Alex retorted and earned a fist to her stomach. She bent over and groaned as the jolts of pain Amanda pushed her back up straight and crushed her neck between her fingers as if it was a soda can "I thought you would like to keep that stupid annoying mouth **of y**ours shut after what you had to go through because of it." Amanda said as Alex gasped her breath and then released her grip.

"You mean because of the simple fact that I spoke the truth that you deny to admit to yourself..." Alex said back.

If you thought that Amanda was scaring now until now, you were wrong. Amanda left the view of division and went towards her torture tools, she grabbed a heavy chain and came back to Alex. The first that division saw was some heavy chains hitting Alex's arm with force again and again and again. Blood covered Alex's arms, as she groaned and fist and grit her teeth try and control her screams. The whole division was yelling to Amanda to stop but she was lost in her anger. She continued smashing the chains to Alex's hand till the time she didn't hear the terrifying sound of a breaking bone. She sighed satisfied and threw the chains away. Alex let her head down and tried to cease the throbbing pain in her hand and head. She couldn't even remember how many bones Amanda had already managed to break.

"I will break every single bone of yours, Alex." Amanda warned.

"Yeah, you have made it pretty clear. There aren't too much left anyway" Alex said defeated.

Nikita took a step ahead trying to reach out to Alex but she couldn't do anything except watch and pray and think to make Amanda stop. Looking at Alex getting beaten up like that in front of her made her feel so helpless. She felt like rushing towards the screen and wishing that it would teleport her to Alex and if it would be possible then she would rip Amanda's head apart in an instant.

"Stop it!" Nikita yelled and continued, "I'll beg to you. But I need assurance that Alex will be untouched after you're done with it." Nikita said but her voice had lost emotions now. There was just a defeat in her voice.

"The only assurance of that is your trust on me, You never know, I would or wouldn't hurt Alex after I'm done with you. Are you willing to take the chances to beg to me to hurt her and cause her even more pain than the pain that I would make her go through?" Amanda asked and enjoyed her view of Division. Each and every single one of them was broken and defeated.

Alex knew that look of defeat on Nikita's face. She knew Nikita was willing to beg in front of Amanda if there was even slightest of possibility that she wouldn't be hurt later. She didn't care about the pain she would go through because of it. With or without begging, Amanda would hurt her. She couldn't watch Nikita beg in front of Amanda. Not even for her own life.

"No! Nikita you're not going to beg!" Alex yelled and again gained a punch. "You should start listening to me. You better keep your mouth shut." Amanda warned and turned her gaze back to "You're going to hurt me anyway Amanda. With begging or without, you are not even close to be done with me. We both know how this is going to end... And why do you care if I keep my mouth shut or not? Little Amanda Bitch wants to go soft over me?" Alex said sarcastically and was about to earn a fist to her stomach when Nikita yelled "Stop!" She wanted to save Alex as much pain as she could. Even if it meant that the time for to beg to Amanda would come closer.

"Beg to me to stop." Amanda ordered and punched Alex in her stomach again and again as she heard Nikita yell at her to

"Stop! Stop it! Please! I beg of you to stop this! She is a human! Stop!" Nikita yelled and stopped when Amanda stopped after a few punches leaving Alex to groan and whimper in pain.

Nikita glared at her as she already pictured how she would take her revenge for every scar that Alex posses on her body.

"I told you not to beg!" Alex WHISPERED through gritted "Not beg and what?! Let her kill you by her punches? Stop trying to be the strong one and acting like none of this isn't because of me!" Nikita yelled. She needed the blame. She couldn't just stand there and She needed people to blame.

"Oh the saint Nikita still blames herself for everything. I told you before Nikita, this isn't about you or Ari. This is something between me and Alex. It just happens to hurt you in the process. But your pain is just a side effect, not the cause or the goal. Maybe a mean to break my dear Alex..." Amanda said calmly and smiled to Nikita.

"You are a sadistic bitch, Amanda! What the hell do you want? What do you want to stop it? For how long have you been torturing her? Is that how you win over your enemies?" Nikita yelled.

"Oh, from you, I don't think that I need something... she can stop me whenever she wants... but she isn't willing to do so yet..." Amanda started to explain.

"Amanda!" Alex called with a warning tone.

"Alex? you can stop it?" Nikita asked shocked.

"Every choice has its reward, Nikita." Alex replied.

"I don't care about the reward, Alex. Stop her. She is going to kill you! i don't know what you bet on but stop it!" Nikita yelled.

Amanda looked between Alex and Nikita and grinned.

"I will let her rest if you can do something for me, Nikita" Amanda said still grinning.

"What do you want?" Nikita asked defeated.

"Break her. Beg to her to accept defiance, beg to her to give up. You can give up on your pride for her but the Russian pride is not easy to brake." Amanda said and grinned.

"I'll break her finger one by one every 10 seconds till she doesn't start surrendering." She added and roughly caught Alex's hand that was attached to the Amanda had just given Nikita the most difficult task to do.

Amanda bent down to Alex's ears and whispered. "Join me and everything is over. Last chance, Alex. Give up on them and it is over."

Nikita knew it that Alex will go through hell but not kneel in front of Amanda. She didn't even know about what this bet was all about. Alex would prefer to die than give up on her family. If people call Nikita stubborn then Alex is even worse than her.

Nikita looked at Alex and she knew that Alex will die but not surrender in front of Amanda.

Amanda looked at Alex and gave her a sinister grin. Alex understood that Amanda has now started counting the seconds down in her mind.

"You bitch! You know what's going to happen! You know she isn't going to give up! You still just want to cause pain! Leave her alone! Just fucking take your hand off her-" "ALEX!" Nikita yelled when she suddenly heard the first crack. None of them were prepared for it.

Alex groaned in pain and shot her head up. She fisted and opened her hand tight, trying to control her pain. She just wanted to hold on to her screams. She didn't want to look at her family with that pained look in her eyes. She continued staring at the ceiling as Amanda counted down out loud now.

"11-12-13-14-15-16-17-18-19-Give up Alex, Listen to Nikita"-_pause-_CRACK!

"NO! AMANDA! JUST STOP IT! I BEG YOU TO STOP THIS GAME! YOU KNOW SHE ISN'T GOING TO BEG TO YOU! JUST LET HER! PLEASE!"

"21-22-23-24-25-26-27-28-29-You have to convince her, Nikita. Not me." And another crack roared through division mixed with Alex louder groans.

"ALEX!" Nikita yelled again as Alex groaned and twisted more and more in pain. It was getting out of control now. She already had pain radiating from so many parts of her body. But she was still too adamant on not giving up. She would never give up.

"Alex! Please! Look at me! Please Alex, just give up. Whatever will be the consequences, we all will face them together. We all will make our way through it. Just the way we've been doing until now. Please Alex." Nikita tried to use a little soft tone to crack Alex.

The pain made Alex grow more and more irritated towards Nikita's pleadings. She wasn't going to give up. And that was final. Nikita's pleadings pained her and also irritated her with the countdown from Amanda still going on.

"31-32-33-34-35-36-37-38-39-Such a pity Nikita, she is willing to go through so much pain for you even when all of you have given so much pain to her."

Alex sharply arched body on her right side. She almost screamed out from pain. Pain that didn't originate from her finger but from the left side of her chest. It was different and strong. She decided not to concentrate on it and just try and hold on to her screams.

Sean's eyes teared up as he thought what Alex would've gone through because left her. He didn't even gave her time to choose but he just left her. He hated himself for it. All those days that he lost with Alex, he could've made more sweet memories with her at that time. Maybe now, everything that would remain would be pain and her screams and her body right now.

"41-42-43-44-45-46-47-48-49-You should've given up Alex. You're just making it worse for you to save the people who don't deserve to be saved. I am giving you one last chance. Beg to me and I'll spare your last finger."

Amanda suddenly felt like something was going to go wrong. A fear hit her chest. She felt pain in her chest as if something really bad was going to happen. She didn't know what. But she wanted to give Alex one more chance and not break this finger. Something inside her was trying to stop her, as if that part knew what was going to happen next.

But when she heard Alex reply in a firm voice and eye lock, "I know who I am trying to save. I don't need your chances. Go ahead." All the fear ran out and anger took its place. She knew Alex was talking about her. She was tired of listening about humanity. The thought of humanity in her made her angry. She didn't even want that word inside her head. The only word that came in her mind as she thought about humanity; was weakness.

Her rage left through her hand as she twisted Alex's middle finger back with more force and damage than any other finger.

Alex twisted her body more fiercely this time and let out a small scream. _Damn it! What the hell was that?! _Another jolt of pain from her chest.

She tried to calm down and steady her breathing, but now it just caused pain in her chest more than it ever did. She tried to calm down and steady her breathing, but now it just caused pain in her chest more than it ever did. She knew something was terribly wrong with her now. But still she tried her best to manage to get past the pain. She steadied her breath as best as she could so that her family cannot watch her suffer more than what Amanda can make them watch.

Michael's tensed up as he noticed Alex's breathing problem. He was about to get everyone's attention to it but just then Alex got it back stable.

"Are you done now? You broke all her fingers happy? Got what you want?" Nikita yelled at Amanda. This was all going way to ahead of her tolerance. She couldn't keep her cold and controlled self anymore.

"Actually no... I didn't get what I wanted... maybe I should continue breaking her bones..." Amanda said grinning and turned her attention to Alex, who had put her poker face back on place.

"You can continue with the other hand, too..." Alex said defeated trying her best not to let her pain show up in her voice.

"Alex!" Nikita shouted alert. She didn't want Alex to go through more pain, she couldn't take it. She was devastated.

Amanda's evil smile grew even bigger.

"You are fighting an already lost battle..." Amanda commented coldly and stared to Alex.

"Who told you that I care about the battle? I might lose the battle, but I am winning the war over here, Amanda." Alex replied dryly. She knew that the end was getting closer, she could feel her breathing getting heavier and heavier, she could feel her body screaming out of pain but she didn't care anymore. There was no time to save herself and she didn't want to save herself, not if that meant the pain of her family. She just wanted to save her family from the pain and Amanda from her own self.

"How more bones do you want me to break, Alex?" Amanda asked curious.

"I have a few unbroken bones that is for sure..." Alex commented softly.

"I am starting to lose my patience over here, Alex... are you sure that you want to continue this game?" Amanda asked Alex giving her a small chance to back off and spare her some pain before her anger takes control again.

Alex looked at Amanda in question.

"I thought that you already lost your patience hours ago.." Alex said with a small smile on her lips. She knew that she was getting to Amanda and she knew that she was going to die soon. Nothing could scare her right now. She had the clarity and the wise of a dead woman.

"I don't care if I have to torture you more or break all of them while you are watching... you will come to see the truth and you will be on your knees.." Amanda said icily in a voice that send shivers down to Nikita's spine.

"Alex, please... just give up.. what it is that she wants, just give up.. please... Alex..." Nikita started but Alex didn't want to listen to her. She needed to reply to Amanda's comment.

"What exactly are you trying to prove here, Amanda... and most importantly... to who are you trying to prove it?" Alex said and paused.

Amanda bent down closer to Alex, she wanted to see into Alex's eyes and search for any sign of defiance.

"You are trying to make me join you? betray them to spare myself some pain? or you are trying to prove to yourself that there is nothing good inside you? that whatever happened to you killed every emotion of yours?" Alex whispered to Amanda's ear.

Amanda's eyes gained that pained look one more time and anger took control. She wasn't going to let Alex win. Slowly she pulled herself up in a standing position.

"Why? Why are you keep protecting the people that hurt you? they destroyed your life, they burned down your world, they used you, they whored you, they lied to you, they hurt you... each and everyone of them has caused pain in your life... why are you standing still by their sides?" Amanda asked coldly.

"I love them" Alex replied simply honestly.

_"You have something to live for." "I promise to have your back." "This is a safe place." "Sensei."_

"I had promised you safety, a home. A life to live for. I kept telling you 'this is safe place' I promised to have your back..." Nikita kept talking to herself.

"Nikita! Nikita! Look at me!" Alex yelled at her. Anything she did and her chest screamed back at her. But she didn't care about it. For her, worst case scenario; her lungs would be bleeding. But whatever it was, she wanted to do some good now.

Nikita looked up at her as tears flowed out of her eyes now. "Nikita you haven't broken any of your promises. This is still a safe place. The day I'll not have anyone of you guys by my side, that day I wouldn't be safe. No matter what Amanda does, but if you guys are there for me, loving me, then this is a safe place for me. You tried your best to protect me from every possible danger. Even when I was on the opposite side of yours, you never really left me alone. You always tried to get me back. You never left me alone Nikita. And even when there were differences between us, I knew that if there's a safe place for me in this world then its the place with you. You are the first person in my life who made me feel safe. Not even my mother could do that, because in front of my father she would go silent. But for you, since the time I understood that you've got my back I have had nothing to worry about at all. I knew I will be safe and loved. I don't even remember when was the last time I was safe and loved before you came in my life. You are the person who got those two things back in my life. I've lived through my father's death, sex slavery, drugs and every possible situations that can make my life a living hell. But when I had you, since the time I knew you would be there for me, my past stopped affecting me. My life became a safe place to be in since the time I got you in it. And if you talk about having a life without any kind of such dangers then it would never be possible! With or without Operation Pale Fire. I was someone to be killed. I would've grown up to be a Udinov and would've done terrible things. At least now I have the chance to do the right things. And you're the one who gave me that chance Nikita. You! No one looked back at me but you did. You decided to look back at me and see how I am. You gave me a home and a family. Without you, I would be no one and no where. I love you, Nikita. I chose to be in this with you forever. So you don't have any reason to feel bad about this situation at all. You've kept all your promises and still you are keeping them. You still have my back and I have yours. You're still my sensei and I am your student. This is still a safe place. I still have a reason to live for and that's my family. A family that was possible because of you. And I love you and thank you for it. Please. You don't have anything to feel bad about.I don't regret my choices, Nikita. I will never regret them. This is my family, you are my family and all of you are worth of any pain in this world." Alex took a breath as she ended her speech but soon regretted it as her chest ached due to the deep breath. She had no idea what to do. She couldn't complain about it to Amanda and not even let her family know about this.

_Maybe this is the end. _Alex thought and smiled.

Nikita and everyone else were stunned at Alex's speech while Amanda stared at her and smiled.

"Great speech, Alex." Amanda said and clapped sarcastically and slapped her hard. There was nothing more that could give her more problems than her chest now. The continuous heat that radiated from her burns combined with her chest kept any other pain at a bay. All other pain shut down to numbness.

"It doesn't matter anymore Amanda" Alex said as she looked back at Amanda. She didn't care about it anymore. Amanda could do anything now that she would wish for. Nothing could be done now. She could feel her chest weigh heavy now. Amanda pulled Alex's hair down making look directly into her eyes. "You enjoy pain now?" she asked as she tried to find any signs of weakness or submission in her eyes but to her surprise, what she saw was something she couldn't explain. She saw tears. Tears that weren't because of the physical pain but because of something else that she couldn't identify. The pain of fear again struck her chest and her strong gaze went weak.

Alex smiled as she saw Amanda's gaze go weak in front of hers. "You will be surprised how my body had learnt not to react in the pain that you cause me after so many hours." Alex said and kept her gaze steady. "We will see that Alex..." Amanda said and pushed Alex's head down with a jerk unable to stare into her eyes for any longer. The pain in her chest, the fear was somewhere keeping her mind busy. She didn't like it and she hated it. "This is the end I guess..." Alex whispered. "What do you mean?" Amanda said and looked at Alex, confused. The pain was increasing slowly with every conversation that they exchanged. As if with every word the time for the 'wrong moment' came closer.

Alex nods her head telling Amanda to come down and Amanda thinks over it a second but complies. "I truly believe that you can be better than that..." Alex whispered coldly in her ears and coughed out. She could taste blood in her mouth now, new blood. From the cough? "And you know that I am right, too..." Alex added and Amanda slapped her furiously.

"Amanda! Stop!" Sean yelled.

"Sean! This is between Amanda and me. She can react however she wants. No one will interrupt. None will avenge what happened or will happen here. I made my choices, she made hers and I want you all to stay out of this." Alex ordered firmly and looked back at Amanda.

Everyone at Ops was shocked at Alex's backfire at Sean. He wondered where did that come from. _Does she blame me for any of this? Is she still angry at me for leaving her?_

"And you? You don't know when to stop do you?" Amanda glared at her with her usual pride but inside of her, that pain, that fear was eating her up. Every part of her, except for her anger was telling her to stop but at the end, anger won every time. But she still wondered if at the very end will this anger be of any good.

Alex knew it was time now. It was all going to end now. She could feel her breathing constricted. She wanted to cough out but she held on to it, held on to every breath. She knew this could be her last. She made her last statement, "Oh, I do know. I told you this is the end... I die and you lose..." Alex whispered and coughed out the blood and laughed in her possibly last moments. No one understood what was going on until Alex looked back at every one, especially Nikita. "I love you guys. I love you too, Nikita, please don't blame yourself. Be safe." Alex said and fell unconscious and everyone started to call her out. Tension arose inside the Ops and Amanda's fear got answered.

She stood there staring at Alex, stunned as tears pricked her eyes. Her fear was finally answered. She didn't know how to react. No matter what Alex would say or do, Amanda would just make her pay for it. But never kill her for it. The truth was that no matter what, she can never kill Nikita or Alex. She can hurt them out of limits but killing them would never be her plan. Till now she thought her inability to kill them was because of the want to make them suffer but now she realized that her inability to kill them was because of the small amount of humanity in her, because of her sick and twisted love for them. "Amanda! Amanda! What the fuck are you doing standing there?! Help her! She'll die! Fucking help her you bitch! I'll kill you if you don't give her medical attention right at the moment!" Nikita yelled at Amanda as she saw her standing there and doing nothing.

Her held back hurt, anger, rage, pain all came out in a yell, "AMANDA!" Nikita screamed her lungs out. The whole of Division fell silent and Amanda looked at her and then at Alex. She snapped out of her shock and yelled for the doctor as she undid Alex's handcuffs.

The doctors and two guards ran in and lay Alex down on the stretcher. The doctor checked the pulse and shook his head negatively informing Amanda that he can't pick up a pulse.

"Do whatever is needed but just get her back!" Amanda yelled as she saw the doctor's negative nod.

"We are losing her!" The doctor yelled and took in his hands the reviving machine and rubbed the two handles against each other and yelled, "Charge, 200! Clear!" he put the handles on her chest and sent the shock waves through her whole body. Alex's body jumped up but nothing changed in her.

"250! Clear!" again nothing. "300! Clear!"

"Amanda..." the doctor tried to say but Amanda cut him off.

"Save her or you will die too..." Amanda growled the threat coldly and the doctor nodded afraid.

"Again! Charge, 350! clear!" the doctor yelled.

"Talk to you later guys." Amanda said in haste and shut the camera off.

The call ended before they could see if Alex got back at 350. The whole division fell silent as the broken souls were finding a way to react.

Nikita fell down to the ground as the last thing she saw was the doctors shocking Alex to get her back. "Alex... Alex..." Nikita whispered as Michael hugged her and she cried in his arms. He couldn't keep his tears in control too. They ran down freely and disappeared in Nikita's hair. "Fight Alex, fight!" Michael whispered through gritted teeth and pulled Nikita in closer.

Sean couldn't balance himself and he stumbled back towards a wall as his chest ached like someone stabbed it. He met with the wall and slide down. He put his head in his hands, legs lay down just like that. He cried and let it out, his pain. "I can't lose her..." He cried.

Sonya fell back in her chair and Birkhoff tried to comfort her but in reality, he wanted to get comforted. She punched him in the abdomen. She was like the second best Division had but still, no use.

Birkhoff felt like sucker. He had hacked so many things until now, when his princess needed his skills the most he wasn't being able to do anything. "You have to get back, Princess. Fight. Fight for us. For yourself. Or else I swear on ShadowNet that when I'll meet you up there, I will kick your ass." Birkhoff muttered and held on to Sonya tighter.

Ryan's whole body shivered as he tried to say or move. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to comfort them or get positivity back here. He was already broken by what was happening to Alex. He thought he could face anything but never lose his optimistic self. But he was wrong. Today, he was broken. He had lost his optimism and he was at loss of words. A lone tear left his eye. "We... w... we... we can't lose her..." he whispered. "Especially not like this."


End file.
